From passing time to generating new pathways

After my automobile accident, I was laid up for along time healing from some serious physical injuries along with my brain injury.  During this time, I used to spend hours looking out my window staring at this one tree in my backyard.  I would marvel at its beauty and strength. To pass time, I began counting its leaves as they fell to the ground.  When it shed all its leaves, I saw branches branching off in all directions. Today, when I look at a bare tree, I no longer see these branches. Rather, I envision my brain trying to generate new pathways.




Now let’s put this in perspective

This picture is a metaphor for Chris R. with her lights out (which happens more frequently than she’d like to admit—my neurotransmitters inexplicably stop transmitting) & the back right side of her brain is so damaged that 5% of her brain cells are dead. Now let’s put this in perspective. Einstein also had dead brain cells, yet he was able to do more than work at a cash register.



I need to accept this death of my “old self”

Whose grave is this? Surely it’s not mine. This is not my fate, it is? I need to make the best of this situation, but how? It’s all suddenly complicated with questions and issues I never thought would be mine to contemplate. This was not my doing, nor my choice! I’m trying to be gracious. I need to accept this death of my “old self”.




New depth of acceptance

New depth of acceptance. In my 17th year of recovery, I am no longer shamed by lack of hair and scar. It represents a new freedom, pride in what I have overcome.